Going through a tough breakup?

I’m truly sorry for the pain you’re feeling.  While it would be impossible for me, or anyone else, to totally take away all of your pain I do have some advice that might help you find a path to get past your pain more quickly.  Not only that, but it also may help you get stronger than you were before so that some day, when you’re ready, you’ll be a strong and confidant woman and you’ll be able to open your heart and let love in again.

I can’t stress enough the importance of not only doing the right things at this time of your life, but also of avoiding so many of the mistakes that others make when going through a painful breakup.  If you can avoid these mistakes you will be able to cut your ‘recovery’ time down considerably.  Not only that, but you’ll also be able to move on without leaving a trail of wreckage like some heartbroken tornado.

First of all, what not to do: don’t try to talk your ex into getting back with you.  He probably won’t.  Don’t try to bury your pain by eating, drinking and smoking too much. All that will accomplish is help you gain weight and be hung over.  Don’t try to find someone else to love.  As long as you still have strong feelings for your ex you will only be on the rebound and if anyone does get involved with you they will be short-changed because you simply won’t have much to give them.  It’s just not fair to them.

Here are some of the things that you can, and should, do to help you not only get some relief from your pain but also speed up the healing process a little bit. Do take time to remember who you are.  In most relationships we give up a little bit of ourselves, we stop doing things that we like doing simply because our partner has no interest in them.  Now is the time for you to remember those things and start doing them again.

Do take on new challenges.  Many people would say that now isn’t the time to take on challenges since new challenges can be stressful and you don’t need stress while grieving for your relationship.  I say that new challenges can help keep your mind off of your ex.  The pain you’re feeling is intense, it’s going to take something equally intense to help you push that pain back a little bit.  A new challenge may be just the thing.

It doesn’t matter if you decide to go back to school, find a new job, or relocate to a new town or even a new country, these challenges can help you find a little relief from your pain as well as have a long term positive impact on your life.  Think of it as a two for one!

Even though it might seem like it right now, going through a boyfriend break up isn’t the end of the world.  If you handle it right it could even be the start of an exciting new world, just for you!

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